Wanna put the fun back in the holidays? Sure Tax plans and North Korea and Trump and today’s government shutdown are important but no where near as important as what is happening tonight at Burgers and Vine at 10:00.
“That kid who used to rap at the homecoming float-fests and make a fool of himself at the plat is on MTV doing the same shit. Sonoma for life.” Yes, it’s the triumphant return of E-Money, Sonoma’s favorite son.
My daughter hipped me to the MTV show “Are You The One” over Thanksgiving and I became an immediate fan. Not that I like the show, I’m more of a car-crash-can’t-look–away kind of a fan. I am a sociologist remember.
And there should be sociological study based on “Are You The One?” because it is us and we should be scared. The premise: take a group of I-gens, put them in a house for a period of time and have them decide who their love match partner is (according to some secret MTV relationship rubric). If the group can make 11 out of 11 perfect couples at the end of the series, they win a million bucks.
And no, I won’t tell you what happens in the show, you’re going to have to binge watch it over the holiday with a bottle of whiskey and a handful of Xanax. Make it into a bonding family activity like at the Williams pad. It’s fun and educational because you can’t make up characters like The Chad. Ethan is the intelligent counterpart to the rest of the crew, playing the game on a different level but ending with zero trips to the boom-boom room.
“Sometimes you gotta put yourself through hell to find heaven.” Ethan explained, “The experience has made me fake famous.”
And when you are ready to do a deep dive into Ethan’s work look no further than his Instagram feed: emoneymakesbabies, the “Heron in the grass” story is high-larious.
I don’t usually promote rap as a viable career choice but as an alternative to screen time, I’m all for it. Creating is always better than watching and if a student can learn about rhythm, rhyme and poetry plus is able to perform in front of people, that is a good thing.
So meet up tonight for a little homegrown holiday fun. E-Money might even perform his 2010 hit, “Sonoma Ain’t the Ghetto”.
Walt Williams is in it for the money, that and the prestige that goes with 22 years of teaching in California high schools (he’s not the smartest tool in the shed). He firmly believes in more standardized testing and that fitting all students into the same box is really the answer. He strongly supports fracking and that climate change is a fantasy made up by hippie liberals, also that the military needs more funding and that schools should just stop whining.